Reflection on Boxing Day
Some of my favorite things from this year
Christmas, as you might imagine is a busy time for pastors everywhere. With many extra services and sermons to write and plan for, I am scheduling this early, up again to keep my “million week” streak, and dropping in to visit you on Boxing day1 . I hope you have had a blessed holiday, and that it’s brought you near to humanity and to Christ! May we know Him better!
And with that, here’s some of my favorite things this year! It doesn’t necessarily mean these are all my favorite “from” this year, as many of these items are older and not published or new to 2025, but new to me. Enjoy!
Total books consumed (read/listened) - 25! (This is my first year keeping track of this).
Favorite fiction book - “Far from the Madding Crowd” by Thomas Hardy (Runner Up: “At the Edge of the Orchard” by Tracy Chevalier)
Favorite memoir - “Jane Austen Education” by William Deresiewicz
Favorite non-fiction book - I realize with crushing clarity that I need to read more non-fiction. Most of my listening happens when I’m doing other tasks, and I struggle to just sit down and read. Non-fiction is hard for me to listen to, as it needs to be absorbed differently and on the page for me. This is one of my goals. My office is exploding with books I long to read, but never take the time to actually sit down and do.
Favorite self-help type book - “The Art of Gathering” by Priya Parker, also very interesting in light of church and being involved in ministry, which to me is nothing if not really all about hospitality!
Favorite Audio listen/favorite reader - “The Woman in White” by Wilkie Collins (Performed by Ian Holm)
My most popular post this year - I think it got a lot of “heresy hate” reads — ha!
My favorite post I wrote - essays are like children and it’s hard to pick a “favorite” but I wrote the gist of this post during a crushing ten minutes I had to prepare a new sermon in an emergency situation and I felt very much like God and I were working hand in hand. This post is an expanded and polished version of that sermon.
Favorite TV Series: Reformed (HBO)
Most baked recipe: Focaccia bread from Smitten Kitchen. I made the sandwiches a few times, but honestly just the bread is wonderful! I’ve made it more times than I can count now, and it’s especially delicious with soup for our many dinners I’ve cooked for Friday nights at St. Jacob’s.
Favorite place to get recipes: I’ve long long been a huge and devoted fan of the America’s Test Kitchen family of sites/magazines/recipe collections. While I still love that for reliable and fail-proof recipes, I have also gotten really into Smitten Kitchen lately. Deb Perelman’s writing is hilarious and witty, and every recipe I’ve tried has been excellent.
Food Realization: Every month that Husband and I commit to a Whole30/clean eating, it gets easier. We feel better, sleep better and just generally don’t feel so sluggish. This is SO annoying! I don’t really want to believe that my diet and calorie quality matter…. are you with me?! UGH! I’m very stubborn, it will take me many months to give into the truth of this in practice. But on the good news, every time we do this it becomes a little less onerous. January, here we come!
Best Life Lesson: The best predictor of the future is the past. Lay down the grief for how you think things were and accept how they are. There is so much to grieve in this life, and I’m so so so idealistic. Can I lay down that grief without also becoming cynical and jaded by this life? Can I retain my bright hope and optimism? God help me.
Most Difficult Lesson: This year has been hard and deeply humbling. One of the hardest things for me to learn is that being a pastor does not mean I can really help anyone. (Runner up favorite idea: “Help is the sunny side of control.”2) I cannot make things better, I cannot change the course of your life just because I believe you’re going in the wrong direction. These may seem like obvious lessons, but I find myself quickly jumping off my own road to try and save the drowning. The problem is, I have no ability to save the drowning (I am a terrible swimmer!) — only God can save us. I. Am. Not. God. It’s deeply painful to realize I’m unable to save (and even perhaps truly help?) anyone, but also crucially vital to my health. I often feel crushed by the grief of watching the drowning, and perhaps this is where we finally recognize that we all truly truly need a Savior.
Proudest achievement (writing): That ten seconds when I appeared on the up and coming rising list on Substack! Yes, yes yes it’s just because I got some subscribers to convert to paid and all that algorithm jazz, but it still was exciting and brought me some more readers.
Proudest achievement (professional): That our church, St. Jacob’s, turned two and began it’s third year. This feels like almost an impossible dream has been reached! My spiritual director mentioned that the first few years of any endeavor require 90% of the gas and so many things fail in that time. But like reaching the edge of the atmosphere, once we’re there it takes almost no gas to continue. This year used up a lot of fuel, but hoping that this coming year is a little less difficult and a little more smooth.
Proudest achievement (parenting): That Kid is turning out to be such a wonderful and polite little man. I don’t really think one can take too much credit, but I feel like the hard work of parenting is paying off! I so enjoy being with him, and find him easy, happy and pleasant not only for other people, but also at home.
Proudest achievement (personal): I feel like I have exactly the life I want. Yes, it’s full of challenges but personally I feel like I’m just where I would like. I live where I want, I do what I love, and I have a beautiful home and family. This is about the time many people begin to feel the itch of regret and impending mid-life crisis. I won’t be presumptuous but I am very grateful that I have only positive and happy feelings towards the life Husband and I have built so far! I feel content and satisfied — and that’s a lot.
Most Looking Forward to in 2026 (professionally): Being part of Substack Seminary and expanding my network of awesome friends and mentors and co-workers in the ministry field!
Word of the Year 2026: coming soon! Husband and I are going to go on a date night and reflect more on this last year, and what we want as a family and personally for this next year!
Thank for you, reader! I am continually amazed that these essays are helpful, interesting and keep you coming back to keep reading. I’m astounded that so many of you are complete strangers to me! Wow! I’ve come to really enjoy writing so much, and even forcing myself to write weekly and come up with yet another thing to say is a wonderful challenge. And another huge thanks to those of you who pay to subscribe. All my stuff is free, and open to everyone to read, but it really means a lot to have this help provide a portion of my professional stipend.
I hope you have a restful and fun vacation week! This is one of my favorite times of the year, when time is short and long, and nobody knows what day it is and we just finally rest from all the preparations and fun.
What were some of your favorites this year? I’d love to hear! Do you have tips for how to “justify” reading more? I need to find a way to get around this mental block. I’m so thankful for God’s provision this year, and look forward to knowing Him better and seeing Him continue to work in my life and soften my heart. May God bless us and rest us and keep us merry!
12/26 is known as Boxing Day in the UK, where it was traditionally the day Lord’s would give their servants their “boxes” and the day off.
Thank you Fr. Cathie Caimano for bringing this wise saying to my attention!
"Help is the sunny side of control"...as my mom would say, "you've gone to meddlin" ha ha. I am a very helpful person when I am not controlling everything. Is that wrong? ha ha
It's funny because I prefer to listen to non-fiction and read fiction. The opposite of you. I realized several years ago I read non fiction like I am going to be tested on in, which I am not, and I need to be better about overviewing it, grabbing a few thoughts and moving on. It does mean I don't always jot down notes as I might like but I get through a lot more information that way. In my ideal world I might own the book for reference and listen to the book to get through it. For me I also think non fiction is easier to pop in and out of than fiction. We only listen to fiction on cross country road trips. So funny how everyone processes information differently.
Great summary post all around. Looking forward to spending another year with you.
I love that you have the life you want, and I share that feeling. It's a joy!
I also share the feeling that when I eat better, I feel better, sleep better, etc. and I *hate* that!
Darn it - it does matter what we eat (she says as she has Christmas cookies for breakfast...)